The Melon via FeedT

Oct. 14, 2008 at 12:53am


by Chris Van Vechten


The Melon is on a mission from G-d to raise $2,750 by the end of the year to cover the costs of our website.  Sure, you say, that is all well and good, but ’tis the season to be donating and why of all causes is The Melon worthy of my $15 contribution?  The following is a brief list I’ve composed to answer that question.

1.  Donating to The Melon is patriotic.  If you don’t donate, then you’re a terrorist.

2.  The Melon is the only blog providing the people of Tacoma weekly - unedited coverage - of the Tacoma Public School Board, an institution that represents almost 29,000 students, 2,000 teachers + para-educators, untold numbers of administrators, custodians, cafeteria workers etc.  I wouldn’t be surprised if over 50,000 individuals in this city were affected on a DAILY BASIS by the decisions the school board makes, which is why somebody needs to hold them accountable.  As of yet, The Melon remains THE ONLY institution to actively promote a transparent school board as evident by our weekly commitment to donate time to the cause.

3.  The Melon is both a primary site for the work of guerrilla documentary filmmaker Joseph La Sac and a frequent venue for social commentators like R.R. Anderson.

4.  The Melon has deep ties to the University of Puget Sound - the Harvard of the West.  Therefore, just by reading this blog you’re effectively receiving an Ivy League Education.  Don’t you think it’s worth at least a $15 contribution.

5.  Donating to The Melon does not require wearing a purplish green wristband for the rest of your life.  You will not need to demonstrate your altruistic nature to anyone because just by donating to The Melon you automatically receive your name brandished across our Support US page for the whole world to see. Furthermore, there are no marathons, relays, or marches for The Melon.  All we want is your money, which means you can support us from the comfort of your own couch.

6.  Just think, for less than the cost of a cu-tip a day, you can be a supporter of The Melon for an entire year.

7.  The Melon is the only major media outlet that refuses to pander to the lowest common denominator.

8.  Melon girls are super hot, check out their blogs here:

9.  The Melon insist on serving its readers in a purely fair and balanced way.  Democrat or Republican, we offer no discrimination.  Too us, you are both equally guilty.

10.  The Melon was among the first to sound the alarm regarding the threat posed by Robert “The Traveller” Hill.  Later, The Melon was among the first to recognize and respond to Jessie Hill's message of change as he ran for Pierce County Sheriff.

11.  In 2007, KUPS recognized The Melon as “the show with the most chemistry” on 90.1FM.

12.  The Melon is the only mainstream blog in Tacoma to offer in-depth beer columns and bar reviews by our esteemed alcoholic Matt Stevens.

13.  The Melon is 100% fat-free, is low in carbohydrates, and rumor has it that The Melon has the potential to be a powerful aphrodisiac.

Assuming you’ve now been fully convinced to make a donation, please log-on now to our Support Us page and scroll to the bottom to our Paypal button to make a contribution.

comments [5]  |  posted under tacoma, the melon


by intacoma on 10/14/2008 @ 4:18am
you might look at making a swimsuit calender with your hot blogger ladies and sell them around town, sorta like the fireman calenders but better!

by izenmania on 10/14/2008 @ 8:50am
sorta like the fireman calenders but better!

We could put them in fire helmets?

by NineInchNachos on 10/14/2008 @ 6:46pm
Right on! I'd be happy to support the melon.

by Crenshaw Sepulveda on 10/14/2008 @ 8:22pm
support your local melons.

by Erik on 10/14/2008 @ 8:24pm
According to the Melon, the Frost Park Chalk Off Competition has now become a supporter (at the Orange Melon Level):


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