Dec. 22, 2012 at 7:29pm
Custom Mailboxes Coming Soon!
Custom Artisan Birdhouses that Look Like Your House (OR WHATEVER YOU WANT!)
better than an exact replica... A TRUE GRIT SPIRIT CAPTURE! A 3D TACOMIC!
HAND MADE in TACOMA WASH. using 100% salvaged materials!
Roofing from YOUR ROOF!
HOUSE PAINT from YOUR HOUSE!
STARTING AT $200**depending on the complexity of your home
a cottage industry as old as time itself...
but wait that's not all... ask about our
NEW, REVERSE Gunsmithing Service!OPTION 1 "BEST FOR OLD GUNS OF SENTIMENTAL VALUE" - for a small fee, political cartoonist RR ANDERSON™ will render any firearm completely inoperable and do it to European standards! BUT HOW? RR will... "drill a hole through the receiver into the chamber, plug the barrel, and weld the firing pin into the bolt assembly." WARNING - your gun will still LOOK like a gun and you are likely to be killed by a policeman if you go waving it around.
OPTION 2 "COMPLETELY FUCKTHESHT OUT OF YOUR GUN" - for the mere cost of electricity, political cartoonist RR ANDERSON™ will melt your gun in half or ugly meat-ball sized chunks with this fucking wicked, homemade carbon arc torch...
OPTION 3 "POUND YOURFUCKING GUN INTO A PANCAKE" - in exchange for a BBQ bottle of propane, political cartoonist RR ANDERSON™ and YOU™ will take turns hammering your gun into a flat gun pancake on a vintage 145 pound anvil using the heating power of this homemade gas forge...
MAKE A POLITICAL STATEMENT!
in response to the NRA's hardline, absolutely tone deaf response to the (you pick school mass murder event) RECORD PERFORMANCE ART OF OPTIONS 2-3 and we will HELP YOU UPLOAD 2 YOUTUBE! You have now made a difference in the world. A few less guns to be stolen by a burglar or a mentally deranged spouse, child or boyfriend! AUTOMATICALLY DECREASE YOUR CHANCE % OF SUICIDE and or ACCIDENTAL DEATH!
Your guns will be destroyed in the most environmentally friendly way and much more exciting than just tossing your guns off the Tacoma Narrows Bridge. You keep the remains as a piece of MODERN ART!
comments  | posted under custom birdhouses, gunsmith, tacomaComments
by NineInchNachos on 12/22/2012 @ 8:40pm
|I will also help you mount your birdhouse on a post if you need help or don't have any post hole diggers!
Your Friendly Neighborhood Political Cartoonist
BUY NOW: TACOMIC SURPLUS!
TIP LINE: email me, TWITTER OR CALL (253) 778-6786
RR Anderson is one of the most curious characters in the UFO lore and the history of underground cartooning. He fought bizarre underground beings in the caves of Alaska, was wounded by a laser before it was invented, and had a background with the clandestine branch of the Tacoma Cartoonists Society.
For seekers unafraid to be discernibly turgid in a time of drastic change, we recommend:
CARTOON ARTIST RESUME
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CENTRAL TACOMA FREE-RADICAL MEDIA EXCHANGE
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Holistic Forge Works
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"may the great winged turtle flap her wind upon us all" ~ Dr. FA Neekburn, 1889