Non Sequitur

Nov. 23, 2009 at 12:56pm

President Obama to confirm the existence of extraterrestrial life

Beam me up, Scotty

Is an announcement of extraterrestrial life from the Obama administration due any time now? There's been some evidence that his Nobel Prize was actually a prelude to this announcement. The French have admitted to secret UN meetings on UFOs.


Or are we jumping the gun here? WIth the rash of 2012 stuff in the media and popular culture, maybe we're being prepared for this horrible thing that won't happen, so that when the government confirms aliens (on say, 12-21-12) it won't be a big deal.


Read for yourself. Would the Spokane Examiner lie to you?

comments [13]  |  posted under Aliens, President Obama

Comments

by L.S.Erhardt on 11/23/2009 @ 1:09pm
This certainly would explain the crop circles on the White House lawn.

by KevinFreitas on 11/23/2009 @ 1:13pm
I wish this were true but it ain't gonna happen.

by Nick on 11/23/2009 @ 1:29pm
Awww, I got all excited because I thought perhaps a legitimate announcement about some primitive form of life might be the topic at hand. As soon as the letters U, F, and O were used in succession, I cried a little inside.

by L.S.Erhardt on 11/23/2009 @ 1:34pm
We all know the UFOs are actually the Robotic Overlords from Cyberton on a scouting mission.

by tacoma1 on 11/23/2009 @ 1:53pm
Does this posting have anything at all to do with Tacoma?

by NineInchNachos on 11/23/2009 @ 2:18pm
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Moon_Hoax

by Nick on 11/23/2009 @ 2:51pm
@tacoma1

It's my understanding that provided the tags are accurate (and the "Tacoma" tag isn't used for the sole purpose of getting on the home page), any topic is fair game.

by L.S.Erhardt on 11/23/2009 @ 6:38pm
yup, yup.

For example: Fredo's hypotheticals. They got nothin' to do with nothin'

by david on 12/6/2009 @ 11:20am
They knew global warming wouldn't convince the world to give Obama supreme power over all the Earth so now he's going to announce we must unite to defeat the alien invaders! There will be a puppet show and everything!

Should I buy bonbons or popping corn?

by Crenshaw Sepulveda on 12/6/2009 @ 12:43pm
Francis Crick, Nobel Prize winner, and one of two co-discoverers of the structure of the DNA molecule was once asked about extraterrestrial in the universe. He replied "they are already here, they call themselves Hungarians". Makes sense to me.

by jenyum on 12/6/2009 @ 5:32pm
I have known for a long time that both Mary Matalin and James Carville were actually extraterrestrials. I mean, just look at the evidence:



(photo by Chris Gampat, Creative Commons License)



and then there is their inexplicable marriage, given their opposing political views.



by NineInchNachos on 12/6/2009 @ 6:29pm
the greys have no penises. I believe there is a link with bigfoot .

by L.S.Erhardt on 12/6/2009 @ 11:07pm
No, RR. Didn't you listen to the video by that dude (supposedly) from the Majestic 12?
(you can find this video on the YouTube...)

He says that the only true aliens are the Reptillians. The Grays and the Humanoids are actually just Humans from the future.

See, apparently we tinkered with our genes too much, ending up like the "Grays". In our quest for more intelligence, we apparently removed our ability for emotions. They have traveled 10,000 yeas back in time to just before the cusp of mainstream genetic manipulation. This is why the gray dudes keep abducting country bumpkins, so they can figure out how to repair their genetic code so they can feel again. As part of "no emotions", they lack empathy. Hence the apparent willingness to mutilate cattle and probe every resident of Arkansas.

Now the Humanoids, which are often described as "Nordic" and "Angelic" are apparently actually humans from 25,000 years in the future, after we've colonized the Sirius, Alcyone and Rigel star systems. Apparently, the fix for the lack of emotions was discovered 15,000 years from now, independently of the data acquired from anal probing. They've traveled back in time to stop the "Grays" from needlessly terrorizing and probing innocent people.

The dude from the Maj 12 claims the US and several other world-powers have been in communication with said aliens and have been, in some cases, trading people to the Grays in exchange for technology... such as semiconductors and fiber optics, and stuff the military has that's 40 years ahead of what the civilians get.

Apparently, after some point in the future when the Humanoids from Alcyone convince the Grays to leave us alone, the Grays scatter some Stargates around the world as a gift of apology. Most of them have now been gathered by the US, Britain, Russia and France, along with one in the hands of China. There was allegedly one in Baghdad, which we now have. According the the dude from the Maj 12, the real reason we went to war in 2003 was to get this Stargate. Screw oil.

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